You pull into the crowded parking lot of a popular eatery and find the nearest parking space. You walk in through the double glass doors and are welcomed by an over crowded entry area full of impatient and hungry patrons. The hostess tells you that it will be a few minutes before she can seat you and scurries off to clean a dirty table. As your eyes scan the perimeter, you see the hostesses approaching empty tables with glasses and dishes stacked while the servers are busy taking orders and delivering food. There seems to be a buzz of urgency in the atmosphere and every table appears to be enjoying their meals while engaging in stimulating conversations. Within minutes, you too will be entangled within the euphoristic dining experience.
For most, this definitely paints a positive and ideal picture of what a dining experience should be when going out with friends or family and generally is what most will experience. But just like every conversation, there are two sides to every story and with my experiences and knowledge there is more to a meal than just the food and drinks. Have you ever thought about what goes on from the other side of the order?
Everyone has a bad day from time to time on the job and if there is no outlet the frustration levels can escalate quickly. When someone works in the restaurant industry they should be able to endure a large amount of stress and frustration. Not everyone who works in this industry is successful and generally the cream will rise to the top. You must be quick on your feet and be able to multi-task with the best of them or else you will be, as we call it in restaurant language, "in the weeds".
Most experienced waitstaff can handle an average of 4 or 5 tables with relative ease; however, it all can quickly change in minutes if you do not have the right staff in place during that particular shift. In order to have a successful shift you need hostesses who are good with people and have the ability to seat tables fairly and not overload one particular server. You also need a strong core of servers to handle the entire floor and all the business that walks through the door. Finally, you need a solid staff working in the kitchen. The kitchen is what is generally known as "the heart of the restaurant."
Much like our own bodies, if we have a bad heart, then the rest of our body will not function at full capacity or properly. If a restaurant has weaknesses in the kitchen for any shift, it can create many challenges for everyone and ultimately leave a bad taste in the mouth of the patron. Once a kitchen gets behind and begins to struggle, the ripple effect is quite noticeable by not only the rest of the staff, but especially by those who have come to enjoy a nice meal.
As I stated earlier, if you are not a strong server, you will generally be more sensitive to stress and frustration. Even the most experienced servers get frustrated and stressed due to one issue or another. It may be a table full of loud children who are making an obvious mess, a table who has finished their meal and are conversing or a long ticket time on a meal which is creating a frustrating experience for the customer. Regardless of the situation or who is involved, every server at one time or another has experienced high levels of stress and the only outlet they tend to use is their mouth. With this being said, it is not necessarily a negative thing, but in most of my personal experiences it generally takes a more vulgar and obscene side.
Very rarely will a server let the table know they are upset or frustrated, but body language is a huge communicator in the restaurant world and it will definitely reflect in the entire dining experience for both the customer and the server. Many servers will blurt out expletives towards their guests under their breath to another server or while they are trying to catch up on all their drink orders in the server station. Most of the time these insults are not directed towards anyone in particular nor are they sincere. It is just a matter of the server using their mouths as an outlet to vent their frustrations for some reason or another. We all have our moments when we are frustrated and have uttered something not so nice under our breathe towards a co-worker or customer. We just have to remember to not let things get the best of us and make the best of every situation.
As a server, it is our responsibility to ensure our guests receive the best service possible and ultimately have the best experience. While it is not always the case to give the guest the best experience ever, it is necessary to provide a positive dining experience even if things are not going as planned. The root word for server is servant and the responsibility of a servant is to serve others. If a server is not willing to serve with a cheerful heart, then maybe they need to reconsider the job they are doing.
I have found the more positive I am during the course of a shift, regardless how busy it is the more productive I am and the better my tips are. There will definitely be times when a server has gone above and beyond the call of duty to ensure a table of guests have a great dining experience and the result is a poor tip. I have had many instances of receiving poor tips, but I keep my head up and continue to deliver great service to my guests. It is then when I am least expecting it that a table will bless me with a nice tip and it makes the shift that much sweeter. It isn't my intention to talk badly about servers and their inabilities to handle stress, but simply to give an inside look at what I have experienced and to enlighten the general public about what their server may be going through.
Just as I had said earlier that there are two sides to every story. Remember your server the next time you go out to eat at your favorite restaurant. If they have put forth an effort to ensure your dining experience is a good one, let them know through giving a smile and a thank you and finally blessing them with a respectful tip of at least 10-15%. Tips are the lifeline for servers and if they have done a good job, then they deserve to be taken care of as well. It goes back to the old saying, "you scratch my back and I'll scratch yours".
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